Stop Being Controlled by Knee-Jerk Reactions
Knee-jerk reactions are the enemy to building relationships and credibility in the workplace. So why do we do it? We are programmed and we let the program run.

I had a full day scheduled. Steven Covey would have been proud. I got to work one hour early and quickly became engulfed in the quiet, undisturbed time. The anticipation of completing that A1 priority was very motivating to me.

All of a sudden, I am removed from my focused state by a familiarly annoying voice. Jack started calling my name down the hall before he even got to my office. He was an internal customer to my department and he was the only internal customer that was never satisfied with the level of service we provided.

My anxiety level began to rise. I saw my perfectly scheduled day going down the tubes. Another day of not achieving my A1 priority would soon be caused by Jack. My frustration was mounting before he even got to my door.

As Jack walked in I stood up abruptly. With a forced smile on my face and an annoyed tone in my voice, I said “Jack, what ever it is, I do not have time to resolve your issues today.” My ‘welcoming’ statement created the exact response that I had anticipated. Jack became loud and aggressive with his comments and demands and an argument ensued.

Step Back and Reflect ... What I had done was create a self–fulfilling prophecy by anticipating a negative encounter, visualizing a negative impact and acting in a negative way.

Who is responsible for the spark that started this fire?

Make your move back to our website for the answer to this question and some free practical tips you can use immediately to stop be controlled by knee-jerk reactions.



Bright Ideas - Gen Gap TeleSeminar

Having a problem communicating between the ages and mastering the generation mix at work? Linda’s program on Solving the Generation Gap will build bridges between your boomers and your millennials so you can direct their strengths to increased productivity.

Linda’s Solving the Generation Gap teleseminar to get some handy tips on how to calm the generational turbulence and discover what influence may contribute to the conflict. Coming soon: stay tuned for date and time.

Taking Turns ...
Linda Listens to Guest Columnist

Joseph Sommerville, Ph.D.
Peak Communication Performance

How To Clean Out Your Linguistic Closet

On occasion, my matrimonial partner has perfunctorily accused me of employing significantly lengthier words than necessary or appropriate. This is an accusation I would like to vigorously, vociferously and vehemently categorize as lacking in verisimilitude. I could express the same thought more economically as: “My wife says I use big words, but I disagree.”

Make your move to read rest of this article.





Questions & Answers on Playing the Game

Linda,
Some of my coworkers do not take me seriously. When I present an idea they jokingly discredit my contribution. I take this seriously and it usually creates a conflict with my other team members. How can I get them to take me seriously?
-- Jennifer

Jennifer,
You can help change your coworkers' reactions to you by taking two easy steps.

• Make sure you present any idea or recommendation in a high-level summary form first, then go into more detail. This is proof that you have done your homework.
  
• Check the tone of your voice. The higher the tone of a female voice, the less credible the speaker appears.

Good luck, Linda

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